Flying and lucidity

I've always been a very lucid dreamer. I more often than not have control in dreams in which I find interesting enough to be a part of. So, if I'm having a good or exciting dream, I can actively make choices and enjoy it as thoroughly as I would (moreso even) than if it were real. If it's dull or mundane, I can just ride it out and 'watch' it from the sidelines. It's like there are two of me in my dreams...my conscious self reresenting 'reality' and my dream self. So if i don't want to control the dream I just 'watch' my other self even though it's still through my eyes. It's wierd O_O
And so I've been having flying dreams much more frequenly the past few years (no the end-of-the-world dreams haven't gone away though.) and I'm doing quick investigation on what it might mean. One website I found simply notes that flying is just fun and if you're a lucid dreamer, you actively chose to do it ^_^. Of course there are the typical definitions - you are flying soon on an airplane, you have good health, you are about to die, there is movement on the bed, or the movement of your breathing brings it on. I'll point out at this point that I don't have unrestricted flying. In every expericence I've not had total control and have to concentrate fully on what I'm doing...it's more like I'm a kite, but I'm also the one flying the kite. Some investigation believes this represents obsticles - people in particular - that are keeing you from rising above a situation and moving forward in your life. My thoughts on the subject during the event are that I have no idea waht I'm doing and i don't want to fall and hit the ground. I'll also note that I never go higher than hot air balloon probably does.
And then I come full circle back to astral projection. i haven't thought about this in years but here it is again, presenting itself to me. If I could remember why I thought it was important and exciting years ago, i might be more interested. But i've gotten older and while it's still fun to think about, I just don't have the energy to devote to fantastical things.

One more thing I came across is sleep paralysis. I can't explain it much, but this website captures it perfectly http://www.mysticalblaze.com/DreamsSleepParalysis.htm . It does happen to me on occassion, and the first time I did, tho unbelieving, think it was aliens O_O I have no idea why I thought that...I'm not exactly particular to that line of thinking and even as I thought it I also thought it was ridiculous! Since that first time I no longer think that, but I do often feel a 'presence' when it happens if I'm alone. If I'm not (usually the case) I try harder than I've ever tried anything in my life to say something to wake up T or Walter - and I KNOW I'm making noises like grunting but I can't move or talk. It really is terrifying but I've try to be calm and just go back to sleep since I understand what it is now.
Well i guess that's about enough. Writing of dreaming, it's time for me to do so now!: http://www.mysticalblaze.com/DreamsSleepParalysis.htm